Thanks for all the comments and e-mails of support. The pep talks and prayers helped. They really did. The bottom line is ... I just needed to get away from work for a few days. I've already seen a major improvement in my attitude because of it.
Thursday I slept late and caught up on some much needed sleep. That afternoon I went and got a 90 minute massage. That was absolutely heavenly! I knew it'd take me awhile to relax which is why I chose the long one. And I was right. I was pretty freakin' tense. But I left there feeling fabulous. And the headache I'd had for the last 4 days was gone. Gone!
I stopped and grabbed some really good pizza on the way home. Then I slipped into my favorite pair of sweatpants, enjoyed my pizza and poured myself a rum and Coke. It started pouring down rain so Griffey and I went out on the porch and sat in my oh-so-comfortable new patio chairs (yes they came already and no you don't get pictures until the porch is finished).
We just sat there watching the rain. It felt so wonderful to just sit and be quiet and clear my head. In fact, my head was so clear, my body was so relaxed from the massage, and my tummy was so nice and full of delicious pizza .... that I dozed off sitting there listening to the rain. Oh... the rum may have helped a bit, too. LOL! But all in all... it was a perfect day! Exactly what I needed. Some alone time and simply just pure relaxation.
Yesterday, I ran a few errands and then ended the day with a friend at my favorite mexican restaurant and enjoyed *ahem* several margaritas. ;) I have some projects planned for the rest of the weekend and by Monday, I'll be good as new and ready to face the world again.
Just for the record, I have no plans to leave my job. I do love it. Most days anyway. LOL! And I have a lot of years invested so I would never move to another department and start over. It's just that sometimes things weigh heavy on my heart. I've learned over the years that when those times come I need to step away. Even if like now... it's just for a few days. If it weren't for the inner turmoil going on within the department right now, I don't think things would be so hard. But it is what it is. It's not going away anytime soon. So I have to suck it up and just deal with it.
By Monday... I'll be able to again.