My Purse/Bag

There's a purse meme going around where everyone takes a pic of their purse and the contents. I think it speaks to the inner voyeur in all of us. We just want to see what goes on in someone else's life. I thought that I'd play along. Plus it's Saturday and I need to delay the yardwork as long as I possibly can. Because I'm a lazy procrastinator, ya know.

This is the bag I carry at work. It's not really a purse and not really a briefcase. It's a messenger bag. Plenty of room for all of my stuff and stylish to boot. Now before you scroll down and become alarmed, remember what it is I do for a living. Those who don't know me can just figure it out from the clues in the pic, I hope. You don't see this kind of stuff in a woman's bag everyday now do you?

The contents of the bag...........

My job related items which are the radio, handcuffs, badge, and a 40 caliber Glock. This particular holster clips onto the waistband of my pants. But I always keep a belt with it depending on my choice of attire for that day. BTW it's really hard to find women's slacks with belt loops. Seriously. I bet you never paid attention before. Look next time you shop. You'll see what I'm talking about. And try shopping for suits or jackets that conceal a giant bulge on your hip. Ain't so easy, my friend. I usually have this crap on at work but if I run into the grocery or something on the way home, I just slide it all off and stick it in the bag.

My minimalistic make up bag with a mini hair brush, hair ties, dental floss, bobby pins, tweezers, band-aids, compact, lipgloss and lipstick. One lipstick ladies. Just one. I've seen your purses. Whatever I wear that day goes in the bag.

Sunglasses, cell phone, my fave lotion (so I have soft good smelling hands when I handcuff bad guys), penguin change holder, my paycheck from last week at the second job which I haven't deposited yet, my work keys (yes that is a handcuff key on there), my business card holder, a Crystal Lite packet, Tic Tacs (I need fresh breath when interrogating people ya know), my non-descript wallet which contains 1 credit card, debit card, my other badge, police ID, driver's license (no you can't see that awful pic) and other people's business cards, receipts, etc, and of course a notebook and lots of pens. Damn, I just realized that I don't have a pair of rubber gloves in there. I usually have some but must not have replaced them after the last use. Glad I noticed that. A girl never knows when she might have to glove up. LOL!

This is the mini that I carry when I'm not at work and don't feel like lugging all that weight around. Yes, I'm a Coach girl. Love them. My messenger bag is needing to be replaced soon. It's a little worse for wear and the inner lining ripped. So I'm on the prowl for a replacement. Unfortunately, with all that heavy junk that I put in it I may need to find something a little more sturdy and non-Coach. So there you have it. My bags. If you'd like to reveal yours and haven't already, then consider yourself tagged.

In Memory of Copper

A friend of mine has lost her beloved dog. She and her husband are heartbroken right now just a couple of weeks before they are due to leave for China to finally meet their beautiful daughter, Hannah.

Sometimes life is just not fair.

Colleen & Jim, my heart goes out to you both. I wish there was something I could do to help you through this difficult time. Here's a poem I found. Maybe it will help... just a little.

From Friend To Friend

You're giving me a special gift,
So sorrowfully endowed.
And through these last few cherished days
Your courage makes me proud.

But really, love is knowing
When your best friend is in pain.
And understanding earthly acts
Will only be in vain.

So looking deep into your eyes,
Beyond into your soul,
I see in you the magic
that will once more make me whole.

The strength that you possess
Is why I look to you today
To do this thing that must be done
For it's the only way.

That strength is why I've followed you
And chose you as my friend.
And why I've loved you all these years...
My partner 'til the end.

Please understand just what this gift
You're giving means to me.
It gives me back the strength I've lost
And all my dignity.

You take a stand on my behalf
For that is what friends do.
And know that what you do is right
For I believe it too.

So one last time I breathe your scent
And through your hand I feel
The courage that's within you
To now grant me this appeal.

Cut the leash that holds me here,
Dear friend, and let me run,
Once more a strong and steady dog.
My pain and struggle done.

And don't despair my passing
For I won't be far away.
Forever here, within your heart,
And memory I'll stay.

I'll be there watching over you,
Your ever faithful friend.
And in your memories I'll run
...a young dog once again.

by Karen Clouston

Happy 60th Birthday Dad!

Today is my dad's birthday. The big 6-0!! He's lived out in Wyoming since 1995 so I don't see him very much. I realized when I went looking for a pic of him for the blog that I don't have any digitals. So I swiped one from my wedding album. I thought about burning that thing in a tribute to my new found freedom once my divorce was final but decided against it. I digress, back to the topic at hand. My dad's birthday! These pics were taken May 1999 when I was a little thinner (okay a lot) and my dad was a little less gray. You can see where I get my big shnozz from.

Yeah, thanks for that Dad. LOL!

Awww... how sweet! Isn't this the cutest pic? I'm the oldest of my dad's five children. There's me, Carla and Travis. (Thanks to the blogs he can now keep up with us much better and gets to see pics, too. Way better than long distance phone calls.) Then my dad re-married and had a second set. Ryan is 19 and Lauren is 18. Both will be out of the house in the fall and off to college. My dad will finally be an empty nester. What to do with all that freedom? Maybe he might think about moving back here now... hint hint. Just a thought, Dad. :)

Happy 60th Birthday Dad!

I love you and I hope you enjoy your day! Wish we could be there to celebrate it with you.

My New Toy!

I take my bagless vac canister out on the deck to empty it. Even though it's way better than a bag it's still a little messy. It's just easier to do it outside. Well, a couple of months ago I dropped the damn thing. Apparently I dropped it just the right way to blow a gaping hole in the side of it. But I wasn't done vacuuming yet. So what to do? As any resourceful single independent woman would, I came up with a solution....

That's right. Look closer. The redneck problem solver. Duct tape!!

It worked in the short term but I knew it was time to buy a new vacuum. As much as I hated to shell out the money. Being the frugal chick that I am and all. So I reluctantly started the search.

I've been coveting the Dyson for awhile. They're supposed to be amazing vacuum cleaners. I found one that claims to be the best for sucking up mounds of pet hair. That sounded great to me considering that this little dog loses enough fur on a daily basis to knit sweaters for all the penguins in the Arctic.
But these buggers cost $600 retail. So what's a thrifty gal to do? Well, E-bay of course! So for weeks I stalked the auctions. It took a lot of patience and diligence because even there, these were hard to come by. Many other people were also hunting for a good Dyson deal. But I prevailed. I was able to snipe this one for $440... and that includes shipping!! Woo Hoo! Yes, it's an expensive vacuum. But it also has a 5 year warranty. And they say it's worth every penny when you see how great your carpet looks. I saved sooooo much money. I'm so freakin' proud of myself! I can't wait to get it out of the box and try it out this weekend.

What?! Wait! OMG! What did I just say? What's happened to me? I used to be the wild and crazy, fun party girl. Now I'm excited about spending the weekend with my new vacuum?! Is this what happens when you turn 35 and decide to become a mom? Someone please help me. I've completely lost it now.
Dude, this is pathetic.......

* No offense meant by the use of the word redneck... cuz I am's one. Or to anyone out there who may truly feel that duct tape is a national treasure.

How I Spent My 1 Year LID-versary

I decided that I wanted to have fun instead of being down in the dumps. I certainly didn't want to look back someday and remember moping around, feeling sorry for myself, and being all depressed. I wanted to create some great memories! So I called in sick to work (Shhhh Teri! Don't rat me out. LOL!) and called my buddy Stacy to meet me for a fun day at the mall. I figured some girlfriend time, a little shoppy, and some freedom with no schedule and no responsibilities would perk me right up.

For what was probably one of the only times in recorded history, I actually showed up first! But in Stacy's defense, she had about a 2 1/2 hour drive and it only took me 45 minutes. Right next to Babies R Us was this restaurant. Baby stuff and margaritas! Perfect combination. Whoever came up with this idea is a GENIUS! I was in heaven. After some morning shoppy, we headed in for lunch.

I totally corrupted Stacy by convincing her that it was completely appropriate to drink tequilla in the middle of the afternoon. So she ordered one for herself. Since it was my LID-versary and all... I had a TWO margarita lunch. Actually, it was a sangria-margarita combo. Ahh...life is good! As I sat there sipping it with a big 'ole grin on my face, I realized how this was so much more fun than going to work woulda been. Hee hee. Sometimes it's good to be bad!

After much mall shoppy, Stacy, wanted to check out this ginormous grocery store called Jungle Jim's which was right down the street. It has all kinds of sections for international foods. Naturally, we had to check out the Asian section. We thought maybe we could prepare ourselves for snack food buying in China if we got a little head start. We found some very interesting things. Like these green bean popsicles. Hmmmm... not sure about those. But I guess maybe that's one way to get your kids to eat their veggies.

We scoured the British section looking for some of this for our buddy, Connie. No luck unfortunately. But look what we found in the frozen food section. Obviously, I had to take advantage of the photo op. We were tsk-tsked by an employee who walked by and told us no pics were allowed. WTF?! It's a grocery store, dude. Not the Museum of Modern Art. Are you kidding me?! Yeah, whatever. As you can see, we still got our pic..... rebels that we are.

We headed back over to the mall a bit later for a Starbuck's break and some girlfriend gab. On a sidenote, I had bought a "red thread bracelet" when I started paperchasing. My intention was to wear it until Mia came home and then put it away to give to her someday. Not because it's a valuable piece but just for the sentiment. I never took it off. Well, it's pretty raggedy now. My red thread has long since shredded and the ladybug charm fell off awhile back. My mom bought me a new one for my birthday but I didn't want to wear it cuz I had promised not to take the first one off until I had my Mia. I brought it with me and discussed with Stacy what she thought I should do.

Since the wait has gotten so long should I replace the bracelet with the new one? Then I'd have one for the first year I waited and one to mark the second year. (And God forbid but I'll probably have a third as well.) She decided that I needed to wear the new one because the charm says "Believe". Which is something we all need to do even more so now because we're starting to get discouraged. But why not wear them both? Even with the third "Good Fortune" bracelet that I wear daily, we thought they looked cool. I'm going to end up looking like Mr T with all my jewelry if the CCAA doesn't hurry up! LOL!

So that is how I spent my one year LID-versary. Shoppy, margaritas, penguins, jewelry, and a great girlfriend. All of my favorite things. I had THE BEST DAY! The only way it could've been better was if the ever busy Connie had answered her phone and played hooky with us. Snort! (Just kidding sweet pea! We knew it was impossible for you to tear yourself away from work or you would've been there. Next time for sure!)

I'm in a much better frame of mind now. I feel refreshed, rejuvenated and ready to face the rest of this wait. This is exactly what I needed to turn my attitude around and pull me out of that funk. My sunshine is back! Thanks Stacy for making that long drive over to brighten my day!

One Year Waiting....

Since I've been waiting all my life for you, one year really isn't that long, I guess. So I'll go on waiting for you, Mia. No matter how long it takes. I promise. Because I know that someday the wait will end and I'll hold you in my arms......
And on that day my dream will come true.

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

*Created by the magnificent Connie and borrowed with her permission.

Unexpected Friendship

As of tomorrow my dossier has been sitting on a shelf in China for exactly one year. I'm happy to have one year behind me. But when I started this journey, I thought I'd be seeing my daughter's face at about this time. Or at least within the next six months. Unfortunately, I'll be waiting at least another year for that. Most likely longer though. The reality of that has hit me kind of hard this week. I know you all may find it hard to believe that Miss Sunshiney Pants who always believes the glass is half full and nauseates people with her optimism is a little depressed. But she is. At least she was. But not after she found these sitting on her front porch! (Okay...enough talking about myself in the third person. That's getting annoying, isn't it? LOL!)

Connie is my go-to woman. When I need to vent, whine, complain, bitch, cry, be sad and depressed, she's the one I go to most often. I don't like to be that kind of person so I try to limit it as much as I can. But everybody needs somebody that you can be real with and somebody who just gets it. I've been lucky enough to find a few of those somebody's along the way.

After listening to the depressed me this week, she took it upon herself to cheer me up. She sent these beautiful flowers. They were just what the doctor ordered. Or in this case, what the midwife ordered. (Man I crack myself up.) A much needed kick in the butt to turn that frown upside down and get on with it. Thank you so much Connie! You really made my day. What you wrote on the card was so true. I just need to focus on that. Our dreams will come true. We just have to be patient.

When I started out on this journey, I was alone. I had the support of my family and a few close friends who I knew would help me raise this beautiful little baby. Because I believe it really does take a village to raise a child. But I still took the first steps alone. It was hard. And a little scary.

But then I started this blog. I never could've imagined the connections I would make because of it. The friendships that I've made that I know will last a lifetime. Some that I may never meet in real life but whose lives I've become emotionally invested in as we ride this rollercoaster together. And I know now that I'm not alone in this. My daughter will be raised alongside other little girls adopted from China. I never saw that one coming either. But I'm so grateful for it. There are so many amazing people out here in this same slow boat to China with me. You know what I'm feeling and you understand. I could not survive this wait without you. And for that...I am truly blessed.

Mis-Fortune

Got this in my fortune cookie the other day.

Uhhhhmmm..... always what?

LMAO!

*Oh for those (in my family most likely) who are not schooled in the ways of internet lingo that stands for Laughing My Ass Off! Now you know.

Zoo Day

On Saturday my Single Adoptive Moms Group went to the Columbus Zoo. It was perfect weather. Only four of us (and one grandma) showed up for some reason but it was still a great day. The zoo was crowded. There were several stroller traffic jams. But we still managed to see all the good stuff and the girls loved it. This is Christine and her daughter Mia. (Yes who'd of thunk it... another Mia in our village. Small world.) She'll be two in the fall and was adopted from Guatemala. This is Sheryl and her daughter Alia from Kazakhstan. (And it gets better. There's another waiting momma adopting from Vietnam who's planning to name her daughter Leah. So they'll be a Christine & Mia, Krista & Mia, Alia and Leah. Say that three times fast!)

This is what caused that look of concern on their faces. A peacock came up and interrupted our afternoon ice cream break. Alia was not at all amused.
This is Arianna who was adopted from Guatemala by Lee Ann who managed to escape from my camera somehow.
Look how the girls were holding hands when we stopped to check the zoo map. Isn't that so sweet? They're only six months apart in age. I predict they're gonna be great friends.A penguin pic thrown in just because you know I had to.

We ate lunch by the little pond which was inhabited by many ducks and geese. There were signs not to feed them and we didn't. Well, not intentionally anyway. Chica Mia (as her mom calls her) dropped her french fries. Next thing we knew we were invaded by a swarm of baby ducklings. They were very aggressive. Not shy at all.

Mia was kind of freaked out and quickly exited from under the table leaving the duckies to fight over the fries. It wasn't pretty. Then the geese started hissing at us from behind the fence. Seems they like fries too.

We had a nice but exhausting time. All that walking and chasing babies is a lot of work! I came home and promptly took a nap. It was good practice though. And a reminder that someday I won't be able to take a nap afterwards. I guess I better enjoy that while it lasts......

I'm A Slacker

I'm slacking about everything these days and it seems that I've forgotten to thank my Secret Pal. This was my wonderful May gift that I failed to post on the blog about. But better late than never, right? My Secret Pal pays attention. She knows about my deep love of all things penguin. Check out these Robeez! Are these not the most adorable things evah?! I also got some cool penguin bookmark clips and some Chinese flag Jibbitz for my Crocs. Love all of it.

This month was a fun in the sun theme. Look at that cute little bikini. Can't wait to put Mia in that with her sweet little flip flops and movie star shades. My Secret Pal also included some Barbie arm floaties and some Dora sidewalk chalk. Can't wait for the days when I can take my girl to the pool. We'll definitely be taking swimming lessons as soon as possible. Oh crap... that means I gotta put on a bathing suit, too. I guess I better stop slacking on the diet then. LOL! Thanks again for all of the gifts Secret Pal. I love that this bikini is a 4T. That means when we pull it out many summers from now I'll be able to explain to Mia who got this for her. I'll tell her about all of the fun things we did while I waited for her and that so many years ago way back in 2007 (hee hee) other people were waiting for her, too. You're the best SP!!

My Sanctuary

When I bought my first house, one of the requirements I wouldn't compromise on was that it had to have a big inviting front porch with a porch swing. The beautiful porch is one of the main reasons that I fell in love with this one. I loved the big stone pillars. It took me a few years to figure out the flowerbed. I chose a few things that didn't work that are now gone. But this bush was planted that first year. It started out as a little gallon size thing. Ten years later.... it's huge! Of course it has pink blooms. They're just starting to pop. This year I replaced the old decorative lights with solar lights. I love them! Wish I'd done that sooner. The ladybug flag is new too. The grass is a little brown cuz we're in desperate need of some rain.
These new rockers are my new favorite thing! They replaced the adirondack chairs that used to be there. I never used those much cuz they just weren't that comfortable. Griffey and I spend a little while almost every evening out here now. I sit and rock. I decompress. I breathe. I think. I dream. I relax. I listen to the crickets and watch the lightning bugs emerge for the night. My favorite time to sit out there is when it's raining. Especially during a thunderstorm. Griffey hates that though and chooses to stay inside. I also met a friendly neighbor who must live close by. The first few nights I tried to convince myself he was a bird. But no. I think I have bats in my belfry. LOL! Kinda creeps me out when he does the fly by.
As I sat out rocking the other night, I realized that there is just enough room over in front of the door to lay a blanket down. I imagined rocking in my chair while Mia plays with her toys. Or maybe she'd want to snugggle up and rock with me. Or maybe my little Miss Independent might want to rock in her own chair. Or better yet on the swing. Ahhh..... someday.

Since I've been spending so much time out there lately, I spruced it up with a new welcome mat in my favorite colors. And a new wreath for the front door. Can you see a color theme going on here?

So if you're ever in the neighhborhood stop by. I'll pour you a glass of wine and we'll rock awhile.

Beautiful

Looks like a poster you'd buy in a store or something you'd see in a museum, doesn't it? The color is so vivid. The sunlight and shadow are beautiful. And the old barn and weathered fence backdrop is just amazing.

It's my niece, Tatum, running though her backyard wearing her ladybug tee and tu-tu. It was taken by a professional photographer who'd come to my sister's house to take some portraits of the kids. She just happened to snap this at the right moment. It was completely random and not staged at all. I thought I'd share it just because I love it so much. I think it perfectly captures that childhood feeling of the pure freedom and magic of summertime.

Busy Busy Busy

I've been a bad blogger. I admit it. No time to post. This week has been so busy. Hell, who am I kidding? The last couple of months have been crazy busy in my life. Which is good for speeding up the wait. I still keep thinking it's March for some reason. But bad because my life is flying by and I'm not participating. Unless you consider working and sleeping as participation. Cuz that's all I feel like I've been doing for awhile. Oh wait. I planted a bunch of flowers and started work on "summer-izing" the yard. So now my days consist of go to work, go to other work, come home, water flowers, read blogs quickly, collapse into bed. That pretty much sums it up. Sometimes I get to have some fun on the weekends. Thank God for weekends!

Things should start to slow down this month though. I'm looking forward to it. I've been grumpy lately. I think I'm burning myself out just a bit. But at least the adoption fund has grown. That was the point.

Last night I was so happy to see the weekend coming after a long and stressful week, that I called a girlfriend to go to dinner. At 6:30pm. Talk about last minute, huh? I was happy to find out that she was able to meet me on the spur of the moment even though she has a 19 month old. This gave me hope that it is still possible to be spontaneous with a child in tow. We all had a nice evening together out on the patio of a great Mexican restaurant while I enjoyed my much needed 48 oz Jumbo Margarita. What a great way to start the weekend!